As someone who is still struggles to shake off some of the demons of the past, and move forward with gratitude and freedom, I need to constantly remind myself of certain life lessons.
This week, I want to focus on these ‘reminders to self’.
Today’s reminder to self is : Watch Who You Surround Yourself With
If I was having coffee with you today, I’d tell you that I’m further down the road to realizing that for too long I have seen myself is the way other (certain significant) people have told me I am. For example, I learned to school my responses; to present a picture of being in control even when I was dying inside; to smile when I had scant reason to; to be nice to people who were downright mean to me.
As I began to focus on loving myself, I learned not to take be so mindful of what other people told me. I began to assert myself a lot more.
But every once in a while, I’ll revert to thinking less of myself, because of a stray remark from someone significant who doesn’t really know me after a lifetime. Even though my husband would point out how badly this person treated me, I would make excuses for her. I guess it was a defense mechanism of sorts – my refusal to admit that I had allowed someone to control and use me for so long. Finally, I have seen the light, but like I said, every so often, I’ll still allow this person’s behavior to affect me. I still have to learn to trust my gut feeling that tells me what they’re say is not true.
So today, I borrow the words of someone else to remind myself to watch who I surround myself with:
Don’t you dare, for one more second, surround yourself with people who are not aware of the greatness that you are. ~ Jo Blackwell-Preston
Linking with the Part Time Monster for #WeekendCoffeeShare
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A lifetime ‘s conditioning is hard to shake off . You are right about constant reinforcement
This is something that I thought I had gotten over but as the year ends, I find I did a lot more than I thought… Stockholm syndrome or just a glutton for punishment, ending up finding the same kind of people over and over again.
Yes you need a constant re-inforcement for this feeling. I try to keep people like that at bay, but sometimes you can’t help it. I have had situations that later on I thought i didnt i give it back to those concerned in a language they understand!
Good reminder for our life. But it certainly requires constant practising.
It’s difficult to dodge from such people. But, yes. For our peace and happiness we should. Thanks for reminding us of this, Corinne.
I kind of get addicted or habituated to the presence of someone that not spending my time with them seems daunting.. I become dependent on the person on an emotional level.. it’s hard to let go… I foolishly try to change the person… Only to fail in the attempt..
This is such a valuable post! They say you are what you eat, and they also say they are the company you keep. I had to remove myself from negative people in order for me to be happy.