Is there such a thing as the wrong time to decide? Is there a good time to make decisions?
I’ve made some awful decisions, the consequences of which I still feel up to today, at a time when I felt I was at my strongest. Was it pride that made me feel that way?
Then I’ve made at least one fantastic decision at a time I felt that I was at my lowest.
The Wrong Time To Decide?
I found this quote interesting.
“Never cut a tree down in the wintertime. Never make a negative decision in the low time. Never make your most important decisions when you are in your worst moods. Wait. Be patient. The storm will pass. The spring will come.” – Robert H. Schuller
I can see where Schuller is coming from when it comes to decisions about entering into a new relationship, embarking on an adventure or making a big career change.
But what is the right time for a woman who is being abused to decide that she should leave the relationship? What’s the best time for an employee to quit an organisation in which she feels unfairly treated?
I really have no answer.
This week, like the week before, I’ll leave you with a question:
What is a good time to make an important decision?
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I think there is no one ‘good time’ . It depends and the consequences can only be felt with time. I like the quote. My sister always tells me not to react when I’m angry as I might repent later. And she is quite right always.
I always tell my friends not to make any decision when they are emotional. I however, am yet to learn how to put it into practice. Sometimes, we gotta make that decision and then work towards proving that it was right after all. Isn’t it?
A right decision is always right when your heart and mind both give green signal to the decision. I know, heart and mind are in continuous fight. But, at times, both comes to a saturation point and that when you take a decision. Actually, my heart and mind are continuous fighter and this saturation point helps me to take a decision. Right or Wrong? I leave it to the circumstances.
That’s a tricky question. We cannot in general say what the right time of taking a decision is. I think we worry more about the decision being right rather than the time, and that varies with circumstances. We can’t always make the best decisions. I’m reminded of another quote here – ” Don’t believe in taking the right decisions, take decisions and make them right.”
Right or wrong time of making decision depends on circumstances. But as you said when its about abusive relationship or annoying jobs, we should spare ourselves as soon as possible and should not wait life long for the people to change or things to fall in place.After-all, peace is what we all seek.
I don’t know whether there is a “right” time but there is definitely a wrong time – when you’re angry, upset, grieving, scared….. actually there’s a lot of wrong times now I come to think about it!
The right time is when you make the decision because you will learn a lesson either way.
A very interesting question and it reminds me of Tolstoy’s short story The Three Questions…..and I am also thinking about Hamlet’s procrastination…..Right time….waiting, delaying, or dilly-dallying…..then, when the moment is gone, repenting, grudging, complaining…..
Honestly, I really struggle with this question. I think timing is so important in everything. Sometimes you just have to take a leap of faith and DO it. Other times, it’s best to wait and see. I definitely think the answer to that question is dependent on the circumstances. <3
For me, decision making is a long process at times. But at other times, I am way too impulsive. It all depends on the circumstances and the problem which needs decision making. It is better not to wait for long, if the matter is dire and has started affecting us deeply.
That question has many many answers – all dependent on the situation that one is in. Can we really get to which is right? Maybe never. What a food for thought.
Darla M Sands
So many excellent points in the comments to your thoughtful post. I’m not sure what to add except that extreme emotion can be detrimental in the decision process. Best wishes!
Like so many others have said, I don’t know that there’s a single right time. I’ve made snap decisions that have turned out great; others, not so much (affirming the saying, “Decide in haste, repent at leisure”). I think the more attuned we are to (and trust in) our intuition/gut feelings, the safer we are in making quick decisions.
Some decisions must be made immediately. For an abused woman, the first time she is hit. For someone in a flood, when you are told to evacuate (my neighbor waited two hours, and nearly lost his life. He had to be deep water rescued.) Other decisions deserve more thought. And, by the way, I would chop a tree down in the winter. Cutting down a tree, if you heat with wood (we used to) warms you twice!
The concept of a ‘right’ time so varies from person to person, depending on their threshold of patience, perseverance and acceptance. I’ve seen people waiting indefinitely to decide on something that is extremely pressing and urgent. On the other hand, I’ve also seen rashness leading people to jump to conclusions and deciding on something very drastic at the heat of the moment. I think the right time depends on the gravity of the situation and the extent to which we stand to lose/gain something or someone that is important to us and the values/principles we stand for. Ultimately, no one else can take our call. It is up to us to do the needful and decide when to do it.
Corinne, I agree with waiting. The more emotional I am, the more I might later regret what I did. I find its better to be in a balanced mood. For me at least, that’s when the best decisions are made.
Thanks for sharing, Laurie. I can see how strong emotions can lead to bad decisions.
I think it depends on the situation. If it’s a bad scene, the “last straw”scenario might come into play, when we just can’t stand it anymore. Intuition can be instrumental as well. You just “know” the time is now. Every circumstance is different, IMO.
I agree, Debbie. And yes, intuition does play a big role. I realize that the times I made bad decisions were the times I didn’t listen to my intuition.
There is a wrong time certainly if you are not thinking clearly to make a life decision. The right time is when you have looked at the benefits and losses, the pros and cons, the impact and are willing to accept it then it is full forward! You really can’t hem and haw over a bad/ life threatening circumstance. With abuse too many women end up dead because they just could not decide to leave their abuser.
You’re so right, Haralee. It’s the process that counts, doesn’t it?
This post actually grabbed me by the heart and hurt. My best friend made the deductions to end her life when she was at her lowest. If only I could have made a difference and yet I couldn’t. It was her decision and do I believe she made it at the wrong time YES I do! Life an death decisions should not be made when you are not thinking clearly, when you are clouded by depression and mental illness.
Then there are other decisions and they are not black and white to make.
When I was being abused my decision to leave was always going to be the right one, in that situation I wish I had made it earlier and I wish many people who are being abused would make it earlier, but it is tough when you feel your life or the lives of shoe you loved are in danger.
Clearly this post has made me ponder and I could write a whole essay on it, but I will stop myself. A fabulous post my friend that asks a tricky question xx #mg
Thank you for sharing, Mac. It’s so hard to know when the time is right. When one is being abused, fear prevents you from taking the decision you need to. And when it comes to taking one’s own life, there NEVER is a right time, is there?
Once again, thanks for such a meaningful comment. Love ya.