I’m participating in the Write Tribe Problogger October 2017 Blogging Challenge through October and will be following the prompts suggested. I’ve also decided to focus on the theme of Anonymously Me – stories that people have shared with me and that we could all learn lessons from. Today’s Anonymously Me story was told me by a young man in his late 20s from India.
If you have a story you’d like to share anonymously on Everyday Gyaan, do contact me. You can be assured that I will keep your name and details confidential.
The Price of Courage Is Worth It
How many Indian cab drivers do you know that have an MBA from an Australian university? I’m sure my command over the English language tells you that I’m well read too. So what am I doing driving a cab when I could be working in a corporate office and earning much more, you ask?
Mine is the classic tale of the evils of the Indian caste system.
Born into dominant landed gentry caste family in a town in Andhra Pradesh, I had a happy childhood. After my graduation, my father encouraged me to get an MBA from a foreign university. Australia beckoned and I landed there, happy and excited. I made friends with my classmate, a girl from Telangana. Since we both spoke the same language, it was easy to get on well. Soon we were in love and decided to move in together. Neither of us told our parents about our relationship.
Courage or Comfort?
After we finished our studies, we headed back to our respective homes. I was all set to tell my parents of my intentions to marry my love. Imagine my shock when I arrived to news that my parents had arranged a match for me and the date for the engagement was fixed! This was a time when I had a choice between courage and comfort, between love and obedience. I’m proud that I chose courage and love.
All hell broke loose
I told my father that there was no way I could go ahead with the marriage he had arranged and told him of my plans. Needless to say, there was anger, shouting, and a lot of threats. There were tears from my mother, pleading and attempting to manipulate me with guilt about the family’s honour. I refused to give in.
My father gave me an ultimatum. I was told to leave with the clothes on my back and nothing else. He told me that since he had paid for my education, I had no right to the University certificates. Now you know why I drive a cab. Any corporate will ask for my MBA certificates.
In another part of India, my girlfriend too was facing hell from her parents. She was asked to leave her home too.
Marriage and A New Life …
We both left home and got married and moved to Hyderabad. I started driving a cab to support us. Our love and friendship continued to grow and our joy was complete when our little girl was born.
Paying the price
Life is tough. Our little girl is 2 now and now my wife is pregnant again. We’ve just found out that my wife has a serious kidney problem….I’m trying to get her the best treatment I can afford.
But you know what? I have not a single regret about my choice. The price of courage is worth it. My wife and daughter are my strength and support. Love and courage triumphs over prejudice and fear!
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The prompt for this week is is a quote from Brené Brown: “You can choose courage, or you can choose comfort, but you cannot choose both.”
A very tough decision lead to a very good life. Best wishes in curing her ailment.
I am so glad he chose courage over comfort but wish his father had done the same too. He is happy to be with his wife and daughter and doen’t regret his decision but what about his dreams for their future? Could he not apply to the university for a degree citing the reason for the loss of his previous one? Hope his wife recovers and they lead a long and happy life together with their children.
This was my first thought, also. I don’t know about Australia, but in the US, anyone over 18 is considered an adult. The universities here won’t even talk to the parents – regardless of who’s paying for tuition – without consent of the student! The transcripts are all any corporate entity needs or usually requests. What if you lost them in a flood or a house fire? They should be easy enough to obtain – just need certified copies of the transcripts!
Dr Roshan R (@pythoroshan)
I’m actually feeling really angry reading this. It’s probably an emotional carryover from reading a friend’s timeline where she mentioned she had to take her daughter to the hospital cause the child’s asthma got worse after the Delhi diwali incident. People actually tweeted wishing her child would die.
I read this story and the truth is, I really want to blast the parents of this couple. I want them to hurt at an emotional level for treating their children like they were a commodity with no mind of their own. For letting their children suffer like this just for the crime of falling in love.
It is getting tougher and tougher to retain faith in humanity anymore.
So very sad. When I hear about this sort of situation I hurt so badly for the people concerned. Can he not apply to the university for copies of his certificates? I’m sure there are many reasons why people may need to do this. A robbery, a fire, etc. I do hope his wife recovers and he is blessed with another healthy baby. What a loss those parents must suffer – they’ve lost their son, and they have no contact with their grandchildren. So sad and so wrong! Go for Google – #6 in ProBlogger Challenge
What an awful situation this man’s family put him in. But I do agree with everyone else, there must be some way for him to get copies of his degrees from the University. There are many people who lose them due to fire or theft.
Being parents doesnt give them the authority over the lives of their children. Life is precious and one gets to live it only once. If everyone understands it, many of the problems would be solved, isnt it?
Why is the cabbie not going for duplicate certificates?
That must be a tough situation but kudos to them for facing it so bravely. I wish his wife get better soon and they get to create many memories.
Rohan Kachalia (@rohank01)
A heartbreaking story! I wish the couple all the blessings and happiness in life.
I can’t believe certain parents would be so egoistic to not allow the son to take his hard earned certificates because they paid for it. What gives them the right to think they have to decide everything for their son! I can’t imagine what the son must have gone through.
Really praying that his wife gets better. May God bless their family abundantly!
Kudos to the person who chose courage and didn’t regret or go back on the decision when faced with problems. I feel bad that parents can destroy the career of theie own son for pride.
That must have been a hard situation but so very courageous of him.
Healthwealthbridge by Dr.Amrita Basu
A story that makes me think.I have an intercaste marriage .I was lucky.
the bespectacled mother
This is yet another case of parents treating their children as their property and they have full right to dispose off their property as they wish. It is indeed courageous of this person to leave behind his degree certificates and everything else for what he believed in. I hope his wife recovers from her illness.
A heart breaking story indeed! My hugs to those brave souls that they chose love and did not succumb to their family’s wishes! I pray for them and hope that everything settles and she gets better soon.