Personal responsibility is a very important part of leading yourself.
The Master told the story of the hotel owner who complained bitterly about the effect on his business of a new highway the government had built.
“Look,” said a friend. “I just don’t understand you. I see a NO VACANCY sign each night in front of your hotel.”
“You can’t go by that. Before they built the highway I used to turn away thirty or forty people each day. Now I never turn away more than twenty-five.”
From Anthony D’Mello’s – One Minute Nonsense
As I look around, I see a tendency for us all to blame other people for our present state. We’re abusive because our parents were abusive. We are averse to learning because our teachers failed at their job. We are reluctant to work because the jobs available are not to our liking. We are unhappy because our partners are very bad at relating! The list goes on…..
Self leadership means that we realize that the buck stops with us. Yes, our circumstances shape us. But at this moment, ours is the choice to make. As Stephen Covey says, we are ‘response-able’.
- Action steps:
Think of two ‘problem’ areas in your life just now that are keeping you from being happy. - Think of what the causes for these problems are. Do you think they are caused by external circumstances or others?
- Where will the solutions to these come from? Others? Change in external circumstances?
- Now use awareness and honesty to notice if you are playing the victim.
- What can YOU do to change the situation?
- Write down action steps you will take towards this?
- Start acting response-ably in these areas.
A sign of wisdom and maturity is when you come to terms with the realization that your decisions cause your rewards and consequences. You are responsible for your life, and your ultimate success depends on the choices you make. – – Denis Waitley, author and coach
[Tweet “The final forming of a person’s character lies in their own hands.”]
Today I’m on ‘R’ of the Blogging from A to Z April Challenge. My theme is the A to Z of Self Leadership. I’m also undertaking the NaBloPoMo for April – the theme is ‘grow’ and the Ultimate Blog Challenge.
Yes, I see a lot of that groaning moaning gnashing of teeth about circumstances pointing outside ourselves. I always think, “just own it and move on to something better!” It’s our choice, most of the time.
Carol Cassara recently posted..Passing down digital assets
So true, Carol. Blaming others is going to a fat lot of good for us, anyway!
Corinne Rodrigues recently posted..Brave and Beautiful #LakmeSchoolofStyle #fame
Great quote: “The final forming of a person’s character lies in their own hands.” Anne Frank is another inspiring story. I appreciate your tweets today!
Courtney Turner ( recently posted..Red Dirt and Other Housekeeping Challenges
So true. Hate those victim moments.
Considerer recently posted..Loving the Unlovable (#1000Speak)
One of the things my Uncle would oft repeat is “If you can’t own it, you don’t deserve it” Own as in take responsibility. My Grandma insisted that nobody owes us a thing – when we approach life with that attitude, we automatically become accountable.
Responsibility is the perfect R word, Corinne!
Vidya Sury recently posted..Quiet
So true..the buck stops with us. If we want to happy, we need to work for it..
Parul recently posted..T for Trade
Correctly said, Corinne. Responsibility is the foundation step. What you said is true. We tend to blame our surroundings for everything in life and that needs to stop. Only when we are in a position to accept responsibility will we be able to change situations that aren’t favorable in life. Good post.
Very interesting post. I agree that we all need to take charge of our own lives, while still acknowledging that sometimes there are outside factors that are pitted against us. I remember years ago having a VP tell me that this other guy’s behavior towards me couldn’t be personal… until it was so that everyone could see it.
Still, not only did I overcome it but it worked in my favor in ways that one couldn’t imagine. That was because I’d taken charge so much earlier that this guy got the smack down from many others. That was kind of cool, but it does show that taking charge of your life, doing the right things, can overcome some of that other stuff.
Mitch Mitchell recently posted..Being A Leader Takes Authenticity