Fear Is A Question

I ‘met’ this Forty Something First Time Mom, Claire when she connected with me online. Although we’ve had only a few chats, we do seem to have a lot in common, including a love for reading and yes, blogging.

Claire has a lot of requests for guest posts pending but she was very kind to write this one for Everyday Gyaan. As you will read it’s honest and insightful – just the way we want it.

Thanks, Claire – I hope this is the first of many posts by you here.

May you be inspired – everyday!

I often find myself becoming irritated with my mother.

She is a lovely person, seventy-seven years old and really makes an effort to enjoy her life. She sometimes repeats herself and often tells me off about my mothering or household skills. She still doesn’t realise that if I haven’t come round to her way of doing things by now, I probably never will.

I get impatient and annoyed when she is slow getting in and out of the car, when she stumbles getting up or down the stairs, when she spills a cup of tea. I sometimes find myself telling her off and I feel really bad afterwards. I know that I am wrong to feel like this but my practices of mindfulness and positivity, seem to disappear.

So today, I stopped to ask myself why I do this and I came to realise something.
I came to realise that I am terrified of any sign of physical weakness I see in her. She has always been a strong lady and a strong/ mother and I love her so much. I love her So much and any signs of weakness remind me that I will lose her someday.

Now that I realise my impatience is based on fear, I can try to do something about it.
My mother has chronic asthma, COPD, arthritis and now has a growth on her pancreas. Yet she is still happy, positive and enjoying her life.

So that is what I have to do too. I have to make the effort to lead a positive and fulfilling life, as she does, and to help her to thoroughly enjoy the rest of hers.

I learned today that questioning our fears can give us the answer to many of the mysteries about ourselves.

Read Claire’s Blog – Forty Something First Time Mom