A lot of people get cynical when it comes to relationships. It seems the notion of finding your one true love and forever partner are impossible nowadays. Breakups and divorce are all too common. How then can you deepen your relationship with your partner?
Before I proceed, further, I’d like to say that I’m not an expert on relationships. I’ve been married 13 years and we’ve been through a lot together and come out stronger for it. What I’m sharing comes from a lot of reading, learning and experience. Before we got married, we went for a mandatory (by the Catholic Church) Marriage Preparation course. While it could have been better, we did get something out of it.
If you’re really struggling in your relationship, and still wondering about committing to someone long-term or questioning getting engaged, I’d advise you to read this article on pre-engagement counseling.
With all the temptations and the busyness, can you really strengthen your relationship? Can you deepen your relationship with your partner?
Yes, you can.
7 Ways to Deepen Your Relationship with Your Partner
#1 Make time
Your career is important, but who do you work hard for? What is the purpose of you trying to make it big? Isn’t it to live a comfortable life with your partner? It will be useless to afford the good life and yet lose the people you live for. If you will allow it, the world can take away your time from your loved ones. Make time for your partner before you start drifting apart.
Your partner is not a mind reader. Neither are you. Most problems arise because a small conflict becomes big through time, because it was not talked about or settled in the first instance. Talk about what bothers you. Talk about what you need. Let your partner know what is needed to work things out. And don’t forget to listen. Communication is a two-way process.
#3 Be respectful
Just because you need to be open to each other does not mean you can talk the way you want to. Keep conversations respectful. Don’t disrespect your partner by yelling or throwing insults at each other. Respect your partner’s time by being there when they request you to. Respect your partner’s opinion. Nobody wants to stick around a disrespectful person. I believe that respect is often more important than love.
#4 Understand each other’s differences
Your partner is different from you, no matter how similar you two may be. They have their own quirks, their unique habits or personality. Understand that they have different views because they were raised in a different household; they may have different cultures and beliefs. You cannot insist on what you believe in or know to be final. It is best to just understand and accept their uniqueness.
#5 Know their love language
We all speak different love languages. Know if it’s words, service, gifts, touch, or time and give them more of it. Your partner will appreciate your demonstration of love if you respond to their love language well.
#6 Be adventurous
Do something new together. Travel to a place you’ve never been to before together. Try a new hobby or activity together. Break the monotony of the routine in your everyday lives by doing something different and out of the ordinary once in a while. This will enable you to also look at your partner in a different way, especially if you’ve been together for a long time.
#7 Give space
Time away from your partner can actually deepen your relationship when done right. You need to give each other enough space to grow. Let your partner be if they need some alone time. Some people need me-time to recharge so they can be better. Let them celebrate their individuality. Allow them to spend time with their friends. Give them time for personal development.
Remember: Relationships take time to grow. Don’t let your relationship die by not giving it proper care. Nourish your relationship.
Great advice Corinne! I think love shows itself in respect. I am not sure where the wedding cake custom began of couples shoving cake in each other’s faces, but I think it is an act that is the exact opposite of the promises couples make to “Love, Honor and Cherish” maybe it’s “Love, Honor and Cherish, until the wedding reception, then all bets are off.” Thanks for this post.
Oh that’s a pet peeve of mine, Michele. I hate that cake smearing thing even for birthdays! Personally, I think there’s too much emphasis on ‘have-tos’ for weddings and less focus on the marriage.
Corinne Rodrigues recently posted..Chop Wood Carry Water and Wash Hands
I was nodding my head throughout the read. These words are so true, something that every relationship should follow. ❤️
Dashy recently posted..On Mothers and Chores
Glad it made sense to you, Dashy.
Corinne Rodrigues recently posted..The Little Things That Make Me Smile
Hi Corinne – Landed on your blog via Leanne’s Cresting the Hill. You have listed some very basic but extremely important aspects of keeping a relationship going. Like you said there are bound to be ups and downs, but the critical point is how we draw strength from these rather than allow them to bog us down.
Pradeep recently posted..Mask shaming
Pradeep, coincidentally, I’m just visiting your blog!
You’re right about relationships – it’s constantly learning and growing together!
Mahati ramya adivishnu
All points you mention really help in improving relationship. I see many couples these days are not giving space to each other and not trying anything new together.
Really important points that help in nurturing a relationship. It’s not easy but when you face a storm together you come out with the bond getting stronger. However I would like to add it takes two to tango. If it’s only one person invested in the relationship it doesn’t work and its better in my view to realize and accept it . It’s not a failure on part of the person who tried.
These are all great points. I think that understanding each other’s differences is so important. It really helps to put yourself in their shoes, too so you can see things from their point of view.
Had a hearty laugh when I read the point about learning the language of love of your partner, especially because I am still learning that! Though cliched, I must say that Venusians and Martians do speak different languages. So when they meet on Earth, both need a “google translate”!!!
Mutual respect is another parameter, I found worth investing in. The returns in this category are risk-free and give rich dividends.
These are really good tips to avoid falling into the trap of taking your relationship for granted. Thank you Corinne!
These are wonderful points. Mutual respect is essential for a loving and harmonious relationship. As for mind reading thing, it is something I learnt slowly in my relationship.Men definitely aren’t mind readers
Rajlakshmi recently posted..Dunk your code in the tea #wordlesswednesday