The other day I attended a training programme after quite a while. I’ve been internalizing some of the learning and thinking about a lot of things. One of the questions we were asked started with, “If you had the perfect childhood….” And I wondered, is there such a thing as a ‘perfect childhood’? If you had one, please share in the comments! I certainly didn’t have a perfect childhood. I could spend ages talking about why it wasn’t perfect, but that doesn’t make sense. All I can do is to work on accepting what is my reality, my memories, the joys, the hurts and everything that made my childhood what it was.
Accepting What Is
Tomorrow makes two years since my Mum’s passing. Two years have passed quickly. Since I now live in my parents’ home, I’m surrounded by daily reminders of them. My Mom was a very practical woman and someone who really thought outside the box. She would come up with great solutions to things, crack a puzzle, complete the crossword everyday, and find new uses for old things. I realize that she could have been a great entrepreneur if she believed more in herself and stood up for herself.
As I’ve mentioned before Mum and I had a complicated relationship. But I defy anyone to question our love for each other. She was not perfect, neither was I. And our love wasn’t perfect either. I know that I grew up faster than many girls because she confided in me things that she shouldn’t have. But instead of blaming her, I now realize how lonely she was and how much she trusted me. I never really turned out to be the daughter my parents wanted, but I fought to be the person I wanted to be. But we all had to settle on accepting what is, albeit reluctantly.
“There isn’t a more perfect person somewhere, only a more perfect person we might become, and there isn’t a paradise someone can lead us to unless it’s the world we make for ourselves when we stop expecting it to be delivered by someone else.”
― Merle Shain, Courage My Love
I realize that what I experienced in childhood made me more empathetic to others. But it also made me more needy and eager to please. I’m still in the process of learning to walk that fine line between good to others while putting my own needs first.
There’s so much good that I have learned from my mother. I know that she’s watching over me from wherever she is and reminding me to be accepting of what is my life.
Would you like to take part in #MondayMusings? Here’s how it works:
Write a post sharing your thoughts with us – happy, sad, philosophical, ‘silly’ even. Make it as personal as possible.
Use the hashtag #MondayMusings.
Add your link to the linky below
Use our #MondayMusings badge to encourage other bloggers join in too.
Visit and comment on the posts of other bloggers linked here.
Share the love.