“Then I wondered if everybody has that person that haunts them, the one that got away.”
― Marlon James, A Brief History of Seven Killings
With last week’s #FridayReflections talking about ‘fish out of water‘ and this week’s ‘the one that got away’, you must find something fishy going on with our reflections. Honestly, I’m beginning to wonder what my co-host, Sanch is up to with these prompts. Sanchie?
The One That Got Away
Do you often think of the one that got away? An old love, an old friend, a job opportunity. Or opportunities that you had to make that perfect retort -to tell someone what you really thought of their behaviour. ….. Things you look back at with a ‘What if?’
When I look back on several love interests that I have, I smile and tell myself, they’re not the ones who got away, it’s me that got away – hurt and wounded, but still free! 😉
I’ve made peace with all the friends that have got away – with some, I have perhaps acted in haste, with others I should have let go sooner.
There are a few moments when I think back on missed opportunities. But overall, I’m happy and grateful to be where I am at this moment – loved and secure and using my skills gainfully. Most of all, I’ve found that I have the strength to walk away from drama and situations in which people don’t respect me.
When I find myself walking down the path of regrets or wallowing in things that coulda, shoulda, woulda been, I remind myself that I can choose to be free of this.
Here’s a story from Anthony D’Mello, that perfectly demonstrates how we can be free and enlightened.
There’s a story about Ramirez. He is old and living up there in his castle on a hill. He looks out the window (he’s in bed and paralyzed) and he sees his enemy. Old as he is, leaning on a cane, his enemy is climbing up the hill — slowly, painfully. It takes him about two and a half hours to get up the hill. There’s nothing Ramirez can do because the servants have the day off. So his enemy opens the door, comes straight to the bedroom, puts his hand inside his cloak, and pulls out a gun.
He says, “At last, Ramirez, we’re going to settle scores!” Ramirez tries his level best to talk him out of it.
He says, “Come on, Borgia, you can’t do that. You know I’m no longer the man who ill-treated you as that youngster years ago, and you’re no longer that youngster. Come off it!”
“Oh no,” says his enemy, ”your sweet words aren’t going to deter me from this divine mission of mine. It’s revenge I want and there’s nothing you can do about it.”
And Ramirez says, “But there is!”
“What?” asks his enemy.
“I can wake up,” says Ramirez.
And he did; he woke up!
That’s what enlightenment is like. When someone tells you, “There is nothing you can do about it,” you say, “There is, I can wake up!” All of a sudden, life is no longer the nightmare that it has seemed. Wake up!
Let’s all wake up and let go of that elusive one that got away!
#FridayReflections
If you are new to Friday Reflections, here’s what it’s about. It’s the end of the week, you’re probably exhausted with work, and all you want to do is sit back, put your feet up, sip on some fancy cocktail or wine, and write away.
Sanchie Vee from Living My Imperfect Life and yours truly give you one writing prompt a week to blog about and link to every Friday. The link will be open till the Monday. After you link up, be sure to spread the love by visiting other bloggers who have linked in too.
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The prompt for the week is this quote :
“Then I wondered if everybody has that person that haunts them, the one that got away.”
― Marlon James, A Brief History of Seven Killings
You can link up your posts below. Don’t forget to share the love!
That’s true Corinne. Many times, the old memories haunt us today as if saying that we could have done that-done this. But the best solution is to accept the reality and live in the present happily.
‘Could have been’ scenarios can create havoc in our minds and make our heart weep too. But living in the past has never done any good to anyone, so yes, it’s best to let go and move on!!
I just let go– no point in crying after the one that got away. Must live in the present, and do what I can to make the best of it, today, here, now.
Great words, Corinne. Loved the short story. Let Go and This too shall pass are my mantras to let go off my past regrets and pain. I was also wondering the same about the prompts. have to check with Sanchie.
A very thoughtful post… dwelling in the past isn’t going to make the future any better. Like others said, accepting the reality is what we need to do.
That was a nice surprise ending. Wake up! Face reality and you may be surprise what moving on from obsessing over the same old hurts will do. I’m a big grudge holder and this is a skill I still need to master.
I miss some of my old friends! Some chose to go, some I let go!
But oddly, the memories might still haunt me!
Yeah sometimes old memories haunt me if not in reality but in my dreams. Probably because in reality I chose to let them go. I believe in letting the past bury the dead and move on – on a cleaner slate. Though it’s never easier said than done.
Haha…sorry if my prompts have seemed too negative! Honestly, it wasn’t planned. Just stuff that I thought was interesting.
I love that you think you are the one that got away…it’s a lovely reframe! 🙂
“When I find myself walking down the path of regrets or wallowing in things that coulda, shoulda, woulda been, I remind myself that I can choose to be free of this.” … That moment when we choose to be free, the actually freedom embraces us.
I have tried. But at times, that regret or uncertainty as to why that person got away is still there. Mostly with friends. I have to come to terms with the fact that not everyone stays in our journey till the end. I liked the story of Ramirez.